Confession

Lately I have a new motto. Well not so much a motto but more I have a new view on life. And that is to accept the things I cannot change (Bible cited). Not only to accept them, but embrace them. So for my first embrace, and probably my biggest embrace, please read an email I sent to a group of family & friends about a month ago:

June 17th, 2012

I’ve decided to write this because I know I could never get this out otherwise. The past couple days have been filled with new challenges for me, and after talking things out with my friend, she thought letting people know how I feel and what I want will help in the long run. I’m not sure which people I will give this to and how I will distribute it but I’ll worry about that later. For now, I just need to get my emotions out and be honest.

On March 27th, I was diagnosed with epilepsy. 

Even just typing that hits me hard. It is unreal for me to say and to live with it. But in the past 48 hours I have come to realize it’s true. And I know everything that has happened recently was put in place so that I can start to live with this.

To back track, in March 2009 I had my first seizure. It was 3 months before my wedding on a Monday morning while I was in the shower. When it happens, I never have memory of it but I remember how I felt before, and I remember the pieces of memories I had after. This time, Marc found me as it was happening. He woke up because of the loud noise I made falling through the glass shower door and hitting our tile floor. At the hospital he told the doctors I was convulsing when he found me but I dismissed it…and I think so did the doctors. Tests were run and in the end it was brushed off as “just one of those things”.

Fast forward to March 2012. I had been feeling sick for a couple weeks. Super nauseous throughout the day and by night it would get worse. I just ignored it though and figured I had some weird bug that would go away in time. On Thursday, March 8^th, I got home from work and the nausea was the worst it had been. By 8pm I was throwing up. I knew my body wasn’t right but I didn’t know the severity of what was taking place. Around 10:30pm I went to throw up some more and that’s when my body shut down. Marc found me after the first time. He was in the living room when he heard the toilet seat slam and then a loud thud. When he entered the bathroom I was convulsing on the floor. I came to and I remember telling him I was ok and that I just wanted to sleep. He helped me stand up and that’s the 2^nd time that night I seized. When I woke up from that one I had to go to the bathroom so I had him move me to the toilet. As I was sitting there, that was the 3^rd time I seized. I fell into Marc’s arms and that’s when he decided he wasn’t listening to me anymore. He drove me to the ER (next door to our community) and when we arrived I was immediately taken to a room. My blood pressure was 59/39, my white blood cell count was 24 (normally 4), and I was dehydrated to a dangerous level. I was admitted to the hospital, stayed there for 3 days, and had several tests run. I remember Friday night, probably around 1am, there was a nurse who came to check on me. She and I ended up talking for a while and she told me I had to figure out why I kept passing out. She said I now had a child depending on me and I need to think about more people than just myself. I will never forget her or our talk. 

Two weeks later I followed up with my family practioner. That’s when he dropped the bombshell. Never in my life had the thought even entered my mind that 1.) I had a seizure and 2.) I have epilepsy. I was referred to a Neurologist, had a handful of tests run, and in the end the diagnosed remained.

I’m supposed to be on medication. However, at this time, I am choosing not to take the medication until after we complete our family (it heightens the risk of birth defects). They now refer to my condition as “uncontrolled”.

Over the past few months I haven’t believed any of this to be true. I feel as though the doctors are overreacting, Marc is overreacting, my friends are overreacting. I’ve been fairly dismissive and closed down. That changed Thursday night.

When I got home from work the nausea I had been feeling was heightened. I knew I would probably start throwing up. Marc wasn’t home so I put Bray to sleep and tried to distract myself with TV and relaxing. Around 8:30 it hit me. I went to the bathroom and started throwing up. My eyes went cross and I couldn’t focus. I knew Marc was about 10 minutes from getting home so I was trying to force myself to be ok. I decided to call one of my best friends, Jenny, as she is now a doctor (she has walked me through a lot over the past few months). I told her what was happening and she talked me through everything. I was having a “partial seizure”. Marc got home, I told him what happened, assured him I was ok, and said I just needed to go to bed.

The next day at work was torture. I had a splitting headache, the fatigue I was feeling was indescribable, and I felt totally worn down. After work we went to our friend’s house, where the usual group was hanging out, and I was planning on just laying low. At one point, it came out what had occurred the night before and everyone was pretty upset. They told me I need to call them if Marc isn’t home and I need to stop being so stubborn. They said anything could’ve happened to me, or Bray, and I have to swallow my pride. They said this is serious and I need to start treating it that way.

And they are exactly right. The reality of a seizure disorder hit me last night. It was the combination of having my first seizure since being diagnosed, how crappy I felt the next day, and ending with my friends hitting me with the truth. I crumbled.

Jenny and I talked today and she suggested I get some of this out:  that I tell people how I’m feeling, how I want to be treated, and how to handle me when I start feeling things.

So to my family and friends: I don’t want attention. I don’t want people to worry about me. I don’t want my life to change. I know that I need help now, and I know I have to let people help me. And I will. More and more I understand the seriousness of what I have and I want you to trust me that I will be responsible. If Marc isn’t home, I will call people close by. But when I call, don’t freak out…that will only freak me out which makes my situation worse. If I tell you how I feel and that I know it’s under control, believe me. I am starting to learn my body and learn my symptoms; I have a decent grip on what it will turn into. So when I tell you I know it won’t turn worse, take that as the truth. I know Brayden is involved and I have to think of her, so I am. Trust me when I tell you I would never be too proud if it means her safety. I will be honest with you if you can accept my words.

Each one of you that is reading this is important in my life. And each one of you may be in a situation where I need you. When that happens, let me lead and be in control. If you promise me you won’t freak out, or treat me different, I promise you I will be honest.

Until I start on my medication I will be somewhat of a risk. But I’m aware of that and I’m aware I will need each of you during this time. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for loving me. 


End Email


That was about a month ago and every day I get a little more comfortable. Every day I think, "it's not that bad. There is a lot worse out there." And every day I tell myself I have to stop hiding it. Another step in embracing happened tonight: I ordered a medical alert bracelet. I'm "uncontrolled" right now so I'm likely to have another seizure. Like I said in my email, this isn't about me anymore. This is about my family and for them I need to put my pride aside and stay safe. The next time you see me take a look at my sexy new bracelet and smile. Because it means I'm embracing :)

Birthday Month!

Since Brayden's birth I have been terrible at writing. I'm not even gonna try and catch up the last 11 months but just know they have been cute, funny, and always entertaining :)

The biggest thing going on in our Dailey Life right now is preparing and planning for Bray's 1st birthday party! Huge event at the Dailey household and by household I mean me ;) No joke, I have been planning her party since January. I love things like this and I love Bray so combined, I'm in it to win it. But please don't have these HUGE expectations of some AMAZING party since it's been in the works for so long...I hate it when things are built up and turn out to be a flop. So, keep your expectations at a minimum please.

I want to leave a lot of stuff secret until the big day but I will tell you it's Butterfly themed :) Purple, chocolate, and cream. Not too sure why I finally decided on butterflies but I'm loving it. I hand-made 20 invitations which will be going out in the mail tomorrow. It was the first "mass production" of craftiness I've ever done and I'm more than 97% satisfied with my work. Actually, I've made a good amount of things for her party. A few reasons why: cost (things are cheaper when homemade, am I right ladies?); I wanted things done my way (anyone who knows me should not be shocked by that statement); and I wanted Bray to look back and be proud (insert the Full House theme song here).

Her party is on October 29th and we have lots of her little friends on the invite list. Also, two sets of Bray's grandparents plus one uncle will be coming into town for the festivities, and we are stoked! It's awesome she has such a great family who are able to be here on her special day.

On the 31st, Marc and I are both taking the day off work and spending time with just the 3 of us :) I kind of hope we end up at the Zoo that day (it would be Bees first time) but it'll take some convincing of Marc. Him and those monkeys! So we'll see how the day plays out. Either way, I'm stoked for all the fun to arrive and can't wait to see the Beasley celebrate her day!

PS: You may have noticed throughout this post that Brayden goes by several names. To help with future posts here are all of her names so far:
1. Brayden
2. Bray
3. The Bees
4. Beasley
5. B
6. Beezer
7. Brayden Bear

The Adventures of Brayden Grace

October 27th, 2010

Marc and I had our regular weekly checkup at the doctor's office on Wednesday and like always, the MA took my vitals before the doctor saw me. However, this time was not like every other time...my blood pressure was unusually high. I generally have 100 over 60 (a little below average) but when the MA took my blood pressure it was 140 over 85. Since this was high (especially for a pregnant person 5 days from the due date) she took my vitals again. This time, it was higher. We waited a little bit, I lay on my side, and Marc talked to me about happy, peaceful things :) After awhile they re-took my blood pressure and no change, it still was slightly high. The doctor came in and decided to send me for blood work, then scheduled me to come back on Friday for a checkup and to get the results of the blood work. I wasn't showing any other signs of pre-eclampsia but she wanted to make sure all was well. Of course I was a bit worried and wanted to know everything was ok but I had to work on being calm :) I didn't want to be induced into labor, which is what they would do if my blood pressure didn't go down. The next two days, waiting for my Friday appointment, I was trying to push it all out of my mind.

October 29th, 2010

I went to work at 8am like always and did what I could to accomplish things before my appointment at 11am. I didn't want to jinx myself by sorting out my loose ends (again, I didn't want to have my labor induced) so I left all my stuff at work and told everyone I was taking a lunch break...I would be back. I knew my blood pressure would go down because I figured Wednesday was just a stressful day for me. So Marc and I met at the doctor's office and anxiously awaited the blood pressure check. The MA took us back, put the cuff on, and listened for my blood pressure....she didn't say anything. I said "umm, what was it?" She stayed quiet and took it again. This time she said, "it went up" and left to get the doctor.

Our doctor came in, sat down, and said "Well, are you ready to have this baby?" Apparently my blood pressure was even higher than Wednesday, now 170 over 90, so my doctor said I had to be induced that day. Which, as most of you know, having a baby in October was not in my plans. I started to convince the doctor that we could wait until Sunday (since Monday was November) but she and Marc refused…it would be too unsafe. Whatever :) So from then on out, everything happened very quickly...my doctor called the hospital to let them know we were headed over, asked Marc and I if we had a car seat ready, and told us to get over to the hospital.

At this point I think the two of us were running on adrenaline. I had so many emotions going but, of course, I was trying to organize everything in my head. We had both our cars, all my stuff was at work, our "hospital bag" was at home with the camera, our dogs needed to be fed, and we needed to let our parents know. Being who I am, I had to get everything taken care of before we checked in at the hospital so instead of going to the hospital, we drove the 45min home :) We dropped off one car, grabbed our bag and camera, took the dogs to their "daycare", went back to my work to get my stuff and tell my boss, and after all was taken care of we went to the hospital.

By the time we arrived at the hospital it was 2pm. We checked in and they started inducing me at 4pm on Friday. Since my blood pressure was high they wouldn't let me leave the hospital, they also wouldn't let me get up. The only time I could move was to go to the bathroom...with a nurse. If someone told me at that point what was ahead I never would have believed it. Since everything happened so quickly I didn't have a chance to really learn what being induced meant. My pregnancy was normal all along and there was no reason for me to believe I would have anything besides a "typical" birth. Because of that, I didn't care to learn about inductions or c-sections or anything along those lines. Hell, we only packed a bag with one change of clothes for me, no shower stuff, and nothing for Marc. We both figured it would be less than a day. Maybe that's why people go to birthing classes or read about labor :) I guess those people know. We were taking the "we'll learn as we go" approach. This left us completely unprepared but maybe that was a good thing.

Part II of...The Adventures of Brayden Grace

October 30th, 2010

By early morning Saturday nothing was really happening. I had been induced 3 times already but still not a lot of action. It was a long night with neither of us sleeping and anxiously awaiting for things to pick up. Nurses were constantly in the room, checking my stats, taking me to the bathroom, and doing what they could to keep me and Marc comfortable. Like I mentioned, we packed nothing, so our phones were dying and Marc was smelly :) With no action, Marc drove the 45min home to shower, change and get some more "supplies".

At about 10am contractions started hitting and they did not feel good. According to the machines I was connected to, I was having contractions most of the night...I just didn't feel them. By the time I started feeling them I was a bit uncomfortable :) However, I was encouraged because FINALLY! It had been a long night for all of us and like I said earlier, I was expecting a "normal" and quick labor...I was hours beyond what I had hoped/planned for. I'm sure all the moms out there are laughing at this because nothing can be planned right? And I don't know why I was thinking things would go smoothly...my life is an ongoing story so why would this be any different?

This is the point when things start to get adventurous.

For some reason, one that I cannot remember, the doctor decided they needed to put monitors on Brayden. In order to do this they laid my bed down and the moment I was flat on my back, the monitors started beeping like crazy. Nurses came running, the doctor pushed everyone away, and I began throwing up like crazy. My blood pressure plummeted (which was the cause of the sickness) and Brayden’s heart rate dropped (the cause of the beeping machines). This happened twice on Saturday. Marc had the opportunity to be the one standing next to me each time I got sick…bonding moments we won’t soon forget :)

Throughout the day my contractions kept up and were getting worse and worse. I have always believed I have a high pain tolerance, and I still believe that, but man…this was no joke. On the monitor you would see the line go to the top and just stay there, it would take at least 3 minutes before it would go back down. I remember Marc’s eyes would always get so wide and he’d say “do you feel that? That looks strong”. Thanks Marc :)

By about 7pm I was hurting. My contractions had been going strong for 9 hours and at this point I didn’t care if she was born on the most even date possible, I just wanted her to arrive already. The problem was though, I wasn’t dilating much. I had been induced 4 times, my contractions were a minute apart, and they lasted for up to 5 minutes at a time. I was starting to go crazy and Brayden was not happy either. Her heart rate was dropping slowly as time went on and anytime I lay on my side, her heart rate would plummet so bad the doctor would race in and make me move.

October 31st, 2010

Sometime in the early morning hours they induced me for the 5th time and each time I was induced, the contractions would get worse. As you can imagine, I was in a world of hurt by now. It had been two days of lying in a hospital bed, unable to move, and having contractions for almost 24 hours. But Marc and I were going with the flow and doing what we could to stay distracted.

At around 8:30am two midwives and three nurses came into the room and gave me the scoop: My blood pressure was remaining high, Brayden’s heart rate was going lower and lower, my contractions were strong and not dying down, but I wasn’t dilating past 7cm. They said “we think the only option we have at this point is to do a c-section. In the end it is up to you two but your daughter’s heart rate isn’t getting better and we don’t think Tara’s health can handle much more of this”. I was shocked and in total disbelief. During this whole time a c-section never entered my mind and I always thought I would have a natural delivery with no issues. But when the midwives finished Marc and I looked at each other and said “let’s do the c-section”. In our minds there really was no choice because of Brayden’s heart rate. We saw no sense in risking it and waiting it out. As soon as we said we would go ahead with the c-section a doctor rushed into my room. He made sure I understood what was going to happen, told Marc his role and said he would see me in the OR in 10minutes. And from that point on everything happened quick! There were 5 nurses in my room, working fast, and before we knew it we were being moved into surgery. Marc quickly text our parents to fill everyone in, I was being numbed, and then the doctor started cutting.

I have had over 10 surgeries since the age of 18 so I’m pretty used to it…however, I have never been awake for any nor have I ever wanted to be awake. For my c-section though I couldn’t be put asleep, only numbed and I was absolutely terrified. At this point, I had so many fluids in my body…2 days of being on an IV, injected with all kinds of medicine and penicillin (a whole other story), that I was shaking terribly. And it was totally uncontrollable. I kept asking the anesthesiologist for something to make it stop but she said there was nothing she could do; only time would make the shaking stop. So I was doing my best to stay calm knowing my stomach was being cut open and trying to focus on slowing down my shaking. And…

At 8:55am, no more than 25min after deciding to have a c-section, Brayden Grace was born! There was a drape blocking my view but I heard the doctor announce her birth and I was so happy! Marc could see her and was smiling so big and I remember asking “is she really a girl?” Marc went with the nurses who had Brayden and I was still on the table, needing to be put back together. I kept asking the anesthesiologist (who was the only one with me at the top of the table) “why isn’t she crying? How come I can’t hear her?” And the anesthesiologist was really vague, saying things will be okay. I just kept repeating myself over and over and since I couldn’t see Brayden I was in total panic. I knew babies cry but ours wasn’t and no one was saying anything. Finally, after what seemed like eternity, I heard Brayden make a sad little noise. Marc told me everything was ok, she was healthy and cute, and they would see me in the recovery room.

About 30minutes later I was finally able to meet my daughter and it was the best moment of my life. I loved her!! I was still shaking super badly so I wasn’t able to hold her but the nurses held her up against me and everything seemed complete. Then the nurses left with Brayden in Marc’s arms and I couldn’t have been happier. It was then Marc told me why Brayden wouldn’t come out on her own and why she wasn’t crying when she was born…her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck twice, which was keeping her from dropping (so I couldn’t dilate) and made it so she couldn’t breathe right away. But the nurses quickly cut it off her, opened her airways and after all was said and done she is a perfectly healthy little baby :)

Now...Let the adventures begin!

9 Months

I'm 37 weeks today so at this point I'm classified as "full term". My due date though is 3 weeks from today, November 1st, and I really hope she holds out until then. There are a few reasons but one is I'm not a fan of even numbers so for her birthday to be 10/??/10...it would just be a lot to handle :) I've talked with Little Girl Dailey about this and I'm pretty sure she's on the same page...she wants a November birthday as well.

Over the past few weeks there haven't been many changes. She's been getting the hiccups almost everyday now and that's been super funny. Every time I laugh and laugh...and then try to get Marc to feel. With his fear of hiccups though it can be difficult :) I asked him tonight what he is most excited for and he said he can't wait to see her and see who she looks like. I second that. We're both getting anxious and excited as the date gets closer and closer but again, we'll wait the 3 weeks :)

It's that time where we go to the doctor once a week in order to keep an eye on everything. At this point, the doctor said everything is right on course and there are no signs of her coming soon. The doctor did say Little Girl Dailey has "dropped" (my bladder is well aware of that), but that doesn't necessarily mean she's coming soon.

Last weekend my friends in ABQ threw me a baby shower and last Friday I had one at work. It was great to celebrate Little Girl Dailey with our ABQ people and awesome to see all the support we have here. Her room is now filled with clothes and necessities so everything is pretty much set for her to arrive.

One of the gifts we received was from Helen...a framed poem she wrote to Little Girl Dailey:

"Your mother is an amazing gal,

She's funny, smart, and not so tall.
I met her at work a few years back,

A funny personality she does not lack!

I hope you resemble her and get her eyes,

If you're so lucky you'll be half as wise.

I hope you share her spirit and her laugh,

If you play soccer, you'll have her calves!

She'll be your true, sincere and honest friend,

Giving you great advice right to the end.

You're lucky you picked her or maybe she picked you,

She'll be there for you always no matter what you do.

A friend, a role model, and sports advocate she will always be,

Make sure she tells you the stories behind the scars on her knee.

Ask your mom about the beverage games she likes to play,

And how she felt when you were in her tummy each and every day.

Your mom enjoys puzzles and is quite a pro,

One day she and dad will make pizza with you out of fresh dough.

Be so kind to your mommy, she will love you so,

And feel sorry for her because daddy will never tell you no!"

We have the framed poem on Little Girl Dailey's shelf and hope all will come true! It was definitely a special gift :)

Now we're just resting up and relaxing, waiting for the Little Girl to arrive. We'll let you all know in about 3 weeks :)

8 Months

In theory, Little Girl Dailey could come at anytime now. I'm 34 weeks and my doctor said at 37 I should be ready to go. However, if any of you are taking bets here is the inside line: Little Girl Dailey will be born on November 3rd...which means I have just over 6 weeks to go. My due date is November 1st but I know it'll be the 3rd :)

At my latest checkup everything is on track and things are continuing to go well. I've gained 18 pounds (eek) but my doctor said I'm underweight for what she would expect. Umm, I sure don't feel "underweight". This past month I've been packing on the pounds and I'm seeing numbers on the scale I've never seen before...it's been quite an adjustment. But I'm moving past it because I know it's all for a good cause :)

The movements of Little Girl Dailey are getting stronger and stronger. It's pretty entertaining most of the time but she has gotten into the habit of wrapping her foot in between my ribs. I don't like pushing her away though because I feel like I'll break her, so I just let her stay there. The funniest thing so far happened last night: Marc and I had just laid down in bed and the Little Girl got a case of the hiccups :) For those of you who don't know, Marc HATES the hiccups...but I still made him feel. He said his daughter will never get the hiccups so she was just punching me at perfect intervals. Suuurrrreeee. All these things make me more and more excited for her to arrive already. I think what I'm excited for the most is to see the Little Girl and Marc interact :)

With the countdown getting closer we've been trying to get things wrapped up. Her room is almost set to go (few details here and there), her swings and stroller are put together, and Sadie is starting to learn :) I just hope Sadie starts consistently sleeping through the night because if not, we'll be going back and forth between Sadie waking up and the Little Girl waking up. Overall though, Sadie is doing really well and has been a great addition. I think Scout is much happier with a friend :)

Everything is going great and we can't wait to meet our little one!

7 Months

We're in the home stretch! I'm 30 weeks and over the past month the biggest change has been Little Girl Dailey moving. Yay!! Before, I wasn't quite sure if I was feeling her but now there is no doubt. It's actually been pretty funny and interesting. There are times that are not so fun though like when I have to go to the bathroom super bad and she decides she wants to do a few cartwheels :) But it's been great for Marc and I to see her move and know that she is getting bigger and bigger.

Speaking of getting bigger, I am. For a long time I only had a little beer gut but now there is no question. Over the past two weeks I've been growing and I know it's because she is starting to pack on the pounds...which is a good thing. I'm due in 10 weeks so it's time for her to really kick into gear.

My last doctor's appointment I got all my blood work back and overall, everything is looking good. The doctor said I win the hydration and iron awards :) I took that as a great compliment. The doctor did say though my blood sugar is a little too low and "you need to eat". When I was giving the blood I passed out, probably due to low blood sugar combined with my hatred of needles. The really good thing about this is finally knowing what is most likely the cause of my passing out over the years.

Physically, I've been getting more and more exhausted and out of breath. It makes me feel pretty pathetic. To think 5 years ago I was running 120s every Tuesday (am I right ladies?) and now I can barely put together a few paragraphs without getting out of breath...sad day. Other than that though, everything else is going really well. I've been blessed with an average pregnancy and I'm hoping it'll continue on that path :)

A lot of our weekends have been spent working hard to get her room ready and I can't wait for her to see it :) I'm sure she'll love it! We painted, added a chair rail (who knew how hard that was?), hung up some stuff, and organized her closet. My stepdad and mom have wasted a lot of their Saturdays helping us out since I'm pretty useless lately. My main tasks have been to pick things up, organize clothes, work on puzzles, and give constructive criticism when needed :) So far I'm super happy with how everything has turned out and I can't wait for it to be finished.

We have another addition to our family...Sadie! We knew Scout would need a friend once Little Girl Dailey showed up and we are so happy we got her. Her personality has really come out and I refer to her as The Bandit because she steals everything. At first Sadie and Scout had a tough time getting adjusted to each other...mainly because Scout was afraid of Sadie and spent most of her time hiding. Now though, they don't stop chasing each other and biting ears. It's been a lot of fun and I think Little Girl Dailey will have her hands full with all the dogs :)

Every day we get more and more excited for November 1st and it's just around the corner. It's crazy to think in a couple months our lives will be totally different. I hear it's the best thing to happen and that day can't come any sooner :) For now though, we're enjoying life!

6 Months

Wow, it’s been two months since I last updated. The biggest news came on June 9th when Marc and I found out we are having a girl! We are both super excited and can’t wait to meet her. If she’s anything like I was as a kid I’m terrified but I know she’ll be the source of countless laughs. It’s only been a month of knowing the gender but her room is filled with girl stuff thanks to family, baby showers and friends :) We have an amazing group of people in our lives and each day feel their support.

Speaking of those people, my wonderful friends threw me a baby shower in Seattle over Memorial Weekend. It was so great to see everyone and share this special time. I had a great weekend and loved all the effort my friends put in! Thank you guys :)

Just a couple weeks later, the week of June 12th, Marc and I travelled to California for a San Fran Giants game, the US Open at Pebble Beach, and an amazing baby shower thrown by my sister-in-law. It was awesome being able to see Marc’s friends and family and celebrate with them.

Overall things are going great! I’m not showing too much yet…I have a protruding stomach but not huge. Also, I haven’t really felt much movement. I think I feel something but it’s super brief and then nothing else so who knows? I’m starting to wonder where she is in there and I’m hoping she isn’t towards my back…last week I was having crazy pain in my lower pelvis and it made me think that is where she is. I would like her to move up front though because I hear when the baby is towards your back it hurts pretty badly. So Marc and I try to talk to her every so often and tell her to move.

A lot of people have been asking about her name, now that we know she’s a girl. And to answer all the questions, yes, we do have a name picked out. But no, we are not sharing :) So when she decides to join us (around November 1st) that’s when everyone will find out her name.

For now we’re working on getting her room put together and gathering all the “must needs” for when she arrives. Thank you to everyone who has contributed!! Honestly, it has helped us out so much and Little Girl Dailey wanted me to tell you “thank you” as well. She said she isn’t ready to use it yet, she is having fun flipping around, but said in about 3 months she’ll probably want to start trying on her clothes and playing with her toys. Once we get everything put together I’ll post some pictures…for now, it’s a work in progress.

That’s about it for now. I’ve been feeling pretty good but my energy is still lackluster. Every so often I get a strange headache or pain in a weird place but at least nothing is constant. Overall, things are great and every day that goes by, Marc and I get more and more excited. We’re very anxious to meet her and see what she has to say :)

4 Months

At this point I am just over 4 months along. We had a check up last Tuesday where the doctor was trying to get the baby's heart rate. I say "trying to" because every time our doctor would find the heartbeat the baby would disappear. The doc would find the heart rate on the other side of my stomach, then it would disappear, and she would find it in my upper stomach. This went on and on and Marc and I couldn't stop laughing. We felt like our baby was playing a game of hide and seek. Once we were able to finally hear a heart rate for more than 3 seconds, everything was confirmed that the baby is doing very well. Then our doctor said to us, "You are going to have a very active baby." Marc said that's a gene the baby got from me....whatever :)

(A Mother's Day gift from Marc)

The next exciting step is our ultrasound on June 9th. That is the big day where we are suppose to find out the baby's gender. The doctor warned us though that since the baby has been very active (between this latest heart rate test and the backflips the little one was doing at the 11 week ultrasound) she explained we may not be able to tell. I am hoping we catch the baby sleeping that day...the other trick is to start laughing because that usually makes the baby freeze (when I laugh the space for the baby gets smaller so backflips aren't possible :) ). Marc and I are so excited to find out the gender that we'll stay as long as we need to in order to get a good picture.


This coming Tuesday I will be 17 weeks which is just over 4 months. The doctor said I will probably start to feel the baby any day now and I think I did this morning. I woke up to go to the bathroom around 3am and when I laid back down in bed it seemed like I felt an extra heartbeat...one that was much faster than mine and was low in my stomach. Things like that make me feel more and more like I'm pregnant. As of about 2 weeks ago I stopped throwing up and my sickness has almost gone away. With that gone and without a huge bump, there are times it's hard to believe I really am pregnant. I'm looking forward to feeling the baby move and for him/her to keep growing.

(Mother's Day brunch)

Speaking of growing, I woke up the other day with a bump that came out of nowhere. I immediately weighed myself to see if I gained a bunch of weight all of a sudden but the scale was the same as it has been. Now though, I have a bump sticking out which is pretty hard to the touch. It's been a strange adjustment and something I need to start getting used to. I know it's going to get bigger but right now it looks like a beer gut and makes me feel a bit self conscious. Marc LOVES it and thinks it's so cool and I'll get there...I just need to adjust. It's weird to see your body change after years of it being somewhat the same.


This coming weekend I'll be in Seattle with some of my best friends who are throwing me a baby shower. I'm super excited to see everyone and so happy they want to share this time with me. This is going to be the first time I'm around any of them since finding out I'm pregnant and I can't wait! I'll probably cry since that's what I do lately :) But they make me feel very blessed to have such great people in my life and I miss them all like crazy. There will definitely be lots of pictures to show once I'm back...Am I right ladies? ;)

11 Weeks

Well my 11th week being pregnant started off with an adventure. On Sunday I had some very light bleeding so I called my doctor just as a precaution. Monday morning I got a call back saying I needed to go in for blood work and an ultrasound. Needless to say I was extremely stressed out and worried. I was a week away from the magical 12th week, Marc was at work, and I was home panicking. First I had my blood work done which if you know me well, I am not good with needles. I was already upset, nauseous as always and now I had to fill up five tubes of blood. In the end I survived and headed to the ultrasound.


The ultrasound was one of the coolest experiences ever. Marc met me there and with all the adventure and spontaneity of the morning, we didn't really process what we were about to see or hear. Pretty soon we were looking at the first pictures of our new baby and it was totally surreal. The little one was performing for us it seemed because he/she kept doing backflips and somersaults. I was laughing a lot which would make the area smaller for the baby and so he/she would freeze. I felt like the baby was saying "umm, hellloooo. I'm trying to play here". But when the baby was frozen the ultrasound tech was able to get some pictures. We heard the heartbeat and the tech told us everything looked good. It was quite a relief and allowed us to enjoy the experience much more.

After the ultrasound we headed straight to the doctor where she confirmed the baby was perfectly healthy. She said the measurements and heart rate were perfect and everything seemed fine. At this point though, she told us what might be the cause of my bleeding. My blood work from the morning had come back and it showed I have pretty rare blood...figures right? :) I have "A negative" blood which the doctor explained 3% of the world has the same type of blood. She said "I don't see this type too often" and I felt like telling her I've heard that before ;)

With me having negative blood, it's possible the baby has positive blood (because positive it more common, however we won't know for sure until the baby is born). So she believes my body, when my blood and the baby's blood mixed, was trying to get rid of the foreign blood. The main issue with this is my body is going to start building up antibodies to attack what it believes is a virus. This baby will be fine but when I conceive again my antibodies would attack the new fetus as a virus and not allow a baby to be made. The very good news is they have medicine which keeps the body from making those antibodies. I received an injection the next day and that will allow my body to stop making the antibodies and allow us to have another child. My mom had this same issue (she has negative blood) and after my 1st brother she was able to have 2 more kids...so if it worked 30 years ago I'm sure everything will be fine.

Overall it was quite an adventurous day which turned out great. We weren't suppose to have our first ultrasound until 20 Weeks so we got an awesome chance to see the baby much earlier on than expected. Next week will be 12 Weeks which is suppose to mean my nausea should subside...I'm really hoping that is true so I can start enjoying everything much more. Our 11th week was such a wonderful time for us and we can't wait to see more pictures in the future!

Week 10

I was reading a book this weekend which stated that last week our baby grew muscles. I laughed out loud when I read that because I was imaging a tiny Incredible Hulk, body building in my stomach :) This week it said our baby is developing their bones and joints...Marc and I have both said a prayer that he/she will get Marc's genes for that. The last thing we need is our baby being born but then being taken away to get an ACL reconstruction. The nausea has not subsided yet but I just gotta roll with it. The doctor said it's actually a really good sign with how sick I am...it means my body is doing what it needs to be for the baby. As she said that to me, I turned around and threw up in her trash can. No one is exempt from experiencing my sudden sickness.

I also learned this week that when you get pregnant EVERYTHING is affected. I've always heard the typical, "you get stretch marks", "you'll be sick", "you'll get emotional". Ok, fair enough. However, there is a lot that happens which is not discussed...maybe to spare future moms from dreading all the changes. But let me spoil it for you now: you'll grow more hair than you ever thought possible and your gums become sensitive and bleed with the slightest touch. Oh the joys of growing :)

Outside of the physical changes, Marc has learned to love a new Tara. Unfortunately for him, he has become my new punching bag and I even feel shocked at some of the things I get mad about. As I'm yelling at him for something I felt he did wrong, often times I'll start laughing and can't finish because I know how ridiculous I'm being. He proves everyday how much he really does love me because at this point, I could not live with me if I were him. Somehow he manages to laugh my moods off and when I'm done with my yelling, crying, or tantrum he smiles and gives me a kiss. And that's why I married him :)

Not only is Marc being totally supportive and amazing, so are my family and friends. Yesterday we got a very thoughtful card from Kate and today we got home to a beautiful bouquet of flowers from Ank & Gilly :) Thank you! I also have flights booked to Seattle and Fresno for baby showers this summer...my friends and family are on the ball. Honestly, I couldn't explain how thankful I am for the amazing support system Marc and I have. I know our kid will grow up being spoiled by "aunts" and "uncles" across the country :)

9 Weeks

     By this point I think most people have found out I’m pregnant. We found out on March 7th and told our families on March 9th. All of them were over the top excited and speechless...we hadn't told them we were trying but all of them were stoked. I was 6 weeks by that point and already feeling the wonders of pregnancy. I want to make every woman aware who has yet to have a child…morning sickness is a hoax. It’s actually 24 hour a day sickness (at least for me). Between the hours of 4pm-10am I spend most of my time throwing up and sleeping. Sometimes during those hours I’m not in the comfort and convenience of home so have learned to throw up anywhere. I think my years of college drinking helped prepare me for this…when you need to throw up, your body doesn’t care where you are. Thankfully my mom has supplied me with several Southwest Airlines barf bags otherwise no one would ever want to ride in my car again.

      This past Saturday, I was driving down the freeway with Marc sitting shotgun when he started talking about teriyaki food. I told him to stop, my stomach wasn’t in the mood, but he wouldn’t listen. He started describing what he was going to eat and how good it sounded and that was all I needed. I reached for a barf bag and while driving with one hand, threw up in a bag with the other hand. Afterwards I looked at Marc who was just staring at me. I said, “Don’t talk about food” and he just nodded. I think he’ll start to learn more and more I’m not kidding :)

     We are due on November 1st and are very excited to welcome a new member to the Dailey family. Marc is doing whatever he can to bargain for a boy because he says “girls make me nervous”. I don’t mind either way because really, we have no control. I’ll have an ultrasound at 20 weeks and at that point we’ll find out the gender.

      I’m sure some people are shocked about how soon after our wedding we decided to get pregnant, but oh well. :) We both want kids and are excited to start our family so we figured, why not now? Our one year wedding anniversary will be a non-alcoholic celebration but it’s totally worth it. After all, Marc is getting up there in age anyway...30 isn't too far away ;)

     For now, I’m just trying to stay healthy and figure out a way to keep food down. Marc is trying to make sure I’m doing ok and getting me anything and everything I need. I couldn’t ask for a more supportive and wonderful husband :) All in all, this is a super exciting time for us and we are so thankful for our amazing families and friends who are helping share in our excitement. More to come…

Quotes from Our Wedding :)

Marc and I were blessed with great friends and family who flew in from all over in order to be a part of our wedding. The wedding party started arriving on Wednesday, July 1st and the games began :) Below is a list of quotes (and explanations) that were said throughout the weekend...Enjoy!!

* "Where are you going beer thief? You owe me money!"
-This was said by a bartender at a local brew pub. I ordered a beer from the bartender, then we moved to a table...the bartender apparently wanted me to pay him before I left.

* "It's a possibility I'm not gonna fit in my dress"

-This was said by Lauren, one of my bridesmaids...I believe it was in reference to the amount of beer consumption

* "If she becomes a problem, then I have a problem and if I have a problem, then you have a problem"
-This quote came from my Maid of Honor, Kate, who did everything in her power to make our wedding perfect...including saying this to her boyfriend :)

* "Stay classy Rio Rancho"

-Marc's brother, Jeff, in reference to one of the greatest movies of all time.

* "I think I under-heard that"

-Another one by Lauren, who had to have been completely sober when she said this :)

* "You're not a baby fan? Good. Because I'm a baby whore"

-No explanation needed, but said by Amanda...one of Marc's groomsmen's girlfriends

* "Had there been some fat cows out here (I mean women), that would be cool"
-Brad, one of Marc's groomsmen...again, it explains itself :)

* "How much do you guys drink that you don't know who your spouses are?"

-Jeff, Marc's brother...referring to the bed swaps that typically happen after a night of drinking

* "Just keep blowing on it. Maybe the white stuff will go away"

-Amanda, telling us to get the foam off the top of our beer...of course :)

* "What part of Mexico are you in?" -Brad "The new one" - Kate

* "Did you widdle that out of a single piece of wood out of Nantucket?"

-Jeff again, asking me about the TV stand in our spare bedroom. And for the record, that is a piece of furniture Marc brought into the relationship :)

Anyone else remember any other fun, entertaining, or just plain dumb quotes? Send them my way, and I'll add them :)